Ok, lets see if I've got this right: -
After 2005 Duncan was the most popular boy in the school and had seemingly mastered all the dark arts, like turning Fosters into wine, and curing the sick. Everyone said that he was the 'proper leader'.
Then things started getting messy. Freddie got injured and hit the bottle again. He and Steve started spending too long with Ian, who filled their heads with all sorts of rubbish and convinced them that because he could function ok on five bottles of claret and two hours sleep a night, so could they. Duncan got worried that Freddie and Steve might sulk if Andrew was made 'proper leader' so he made Freddie 'proper leader'- but only for this one fight. He told Freddie that he thought Steve would act like a big girls blouse if Freddie was'nt made leader - only to find that he had already decided to act like that anyway - regardless of who was 'proper leader'.
David listened to Ian too much too, and even though he was another 'proper leader', twatted around when a big decision was called for and let all the journalists make up his mind for him.
Duncan wanted Monty and Saj in his gang, but the others still wanted Ashley, who hadn't been seen with the gang in months, and Jimmy - who had a nasty habit of fouling himself before the gang got into any big fights.
Duncan also wanted Matt, but was told he had to have Chris.
The other David (who could also be seen as the 'proper leader') stayed friends with Duncan but didn't back him up when the rest of the gang teamed up against him.
Then there was Michael - who was yet another who thought he was the 'proper leader'. He got injured too, and when he tried to help Duncan, Duncan told him that he was the 'proper leader' Michael wasn't, and Michael should sod off.
In the meantime Duncan had written a book after the 2005 fight which told how he made a complete prat out of Ricky - the leader of the opposing gang. Ricky got rather narked about it, showed it to all his mates, and they all told him not to worry, they'd make Duncan pay big time. Even Shane and Glenn decided to give it one more go to get Ricky his revenge.
In the real world, thousands of England fans spent huge amounts of money and time following the team Down Under in the passionate belief that this time things would be different and that we wouldn't slink back into Heathrow with our tails between our legs after another good Aussie shoeing.
Just shows how wrong you can be sometimes.
Thanks to the childishness and pathetic behaviour of the squad and the so called management, it was all time and money wasted.
'Proper leaders'? Proper Charlies.